OneShots
by LegnaYokai
Summary: Stuff I can up with while reading the Twilight Series and other stuff that I don't really know what to do with. - '
1. Ending

**A/N: Something I wrote after reading New Moon by Stephenie Meyer. I kept trying to upload this, but kept saying the file had an error.**

Ending

Why doesn't the world end when someone dear dies?! Why can't it all just stop, never to begin again? All loved ones feel lost without them; not knowing where to up where they left off. Others feel guiltier and regret about the last things they told that person. Those feelings of sorrow and remorse and regret flood their minds and souls, never wanting to happy again. They just build up; all those feelings just well up inside, when you feel like laughing or smiling. How can you laugh when they're gone?! How can you be happy and smiling when you're supposed to be mourning a lost life, a lost friend? How can you act like nothing happened, like there's nothing to worry about??

I feel all this now, it may not be a good feeling, but I feel it. Sometimes I don't want to get out of bed for fear of losing someone else. The days are all blurred together; they feel like all one day.


	2. Feelings Betray You

Nothingness. Numbness.

Those are the best words I think can describe this feeling. This feeling only increases when I think of him and that he's found someone already.

It hurts so much, this pain inside me. I know for a fact that it's not jealousy, but it hurts just as much and then some.

How long will this feeling be with me? I don't want to be this over-emotional person. It makes me feel as if I won't be able to come back to now.

_Then don't._

But how can I when I can't stop thinking about him? Sure, the time we shared together may have been like moments for him, but they feel like years to me. Being around him took all my troubles away and I felt I could conquer anything. Now it feels like I've been stripped of my rank, and there's no way to get it back.

_Just think that he's not worth it. It's not the end of the world._

Then why does it feel that way? Why does each day look darker and the sky grayer? Everything feels so such harder. When he left, so did my sun; my colors; my enthusiasm; me. Nothing has interest to me now. There's no spark, no light, no nothing. What's the point of doing anything? There's no purpose.

I tried, tries so hard to act like none of this happened. That my memories together were hallucinations; that his touch, his voice, his smell, his being was something that my mind thought of so I wouldn't be so lonely. That the reality wasn't real, that he wasn't truly gone, that he was there at school, or in his car, listening to music from another time; that the house was so full, is so empty and desolate now. That he was sitting at his piano, writing a new composition pr sitting in his meadow on a sunny day, when he couldn't be around people because of the way his skin sparkled so brilliantly in the light, like millions of small diamonds were embedded in his skin.

Hmmm, it's amazing how someone who isn't supposed to be real feels so real to me. That every thought sends a stab of pain through me.

That presence, _his_ presence, makes me avoid anything, any place, that would remind me of him.

_Why torture yourself?_

Why? Because it's the only way that I feel alive now.

He took everything. Everything that made me feel, react, like there was something to lie for.

_The why'd you let someone hurt you like that? I thought that you were strong._

Hahahahahaha! Because feelings betray you.


	3. Love & Lust

Love…

Is it really all that great?

Does anybody really know what love is?

How can love be great when everyone says 'love is blind?'

Everyone says love is the greatest thing that has happened to them.

What is love?

Is it when someone says that 'they'll die for the ones they love?'

Lust…

Is it really that bad?

Can anyone truly love someone so much that it turns to Lust?

What's so bad about Lust?

Everyone says 'every relationship has a hint of lust.'

Can somebody do both?

Be both loveable and lustful?


	4. Want Me To Live

I can't do this

Live this life you want me to live

I'm not that kind of person

The kind that changes life

So easily

I want to be

That person for you

But that's going against

What I've always known

I don't know if I can do this

Live this life you want me to live

Feeling like I'm back-pedaling

Moving further and further

Away from you

The only thing

I truly know I want

Please…

Give me the strength

To

Live this life you want me to live

Nothing will be the same

But…

I think I can do this

Live this life you want me to live

With you by my side

Helping me through

The toils and foils

Of yesterday

And today


	5. Poems of My Heart

Hope

Hope had changed everything

My mistakes always haunting

Will it ever stop?

Trust

Three have stolen my heart

Two have it, the other broke it

I want to be true

But I don't know who to trust

What must I do to be true?

Heart

My broken heart aches

It wants to love, to be loved too

Can I trust my heart?

Blood

There in the meadow,

Shining, my devil angel,

Smiled sweet death at me

With eyes blood red, he comes near

Suck my blood right out of me

Darkness

Darkness is my friend

The deafening silence think

Devour me now

Wrong

I see nothing

I feel nothing

I know nothing

Right doesn't feel so right

Wrong feels so right

Strange how it feels

Like nothing's changed

But in reality

Everything's gone all wrong


End file.
